Tuesday, July 5, 2011

A Brief Guide to Where To Eat Out

I just realized that I tend to post on Tuesdays. This blog is just like Tuesdays with Morrie except I am not dying (not in the immediate sense, at least), I don't give you important wisdom about life, and I no longer sit at the Morrie picnic table* for lunch on summer afternoons. Prepare for an amazing segue... 

Sometimes I didn't sit at the picnic table because I didn't feel like packing my own lunch. 

Not feeling like eating at home, and unable to be inspired even by the likes of http://whatthefuckshouldimakefordinner.com/? Then here's a quick and dirty guide to places where you (or the glutard you love) might be able to eat. 

Better bets:
-Thai (less ubiquitous soy sauce than Chinese places; curries are usually safe)
-American (assuming you like salads or you are not appalled by burgers sans buns)
-PF Chang's (they have a gluten-free menu and can offer g-free soy sauce -- SOY SAUCE!)
-Indian (just don't eat the damn naan)
-Ethiopian (usually the only wheat is mixed into the teff pancake-y thing)
-Mexican (corn tortillas, whazzup!)
-Places containing lots of hipsters (tend to be aware of allergens and flexible)
-BBQ (assuming you don't need bread to enjoy your meatpile)
-Mediterranean (just don't eat the damn pita)

Worse bets:
-Italian (pasta. bread. breaded pasta?)
-Chinese (ubiquitous soy sauce)
-Bakeries (cross-contamination risk is high)
-Places with lots of fried food (no, you can't have fried chicken and waffles)
-Sandwich shops (bread is the enemy)
-Pizzerias (crust is so crusty, and they tend to make unimpressive salads)
-French (bread, roux, blah, blah blah)
-German (unless you like stuffing your face with only a grip of sausage)
-Bars/pubs (limited menus, lots of fried or beer-infused foods)

Look at all of your options! Mind you, even some of the worse places can be better and some of the better places can be worse! Check menus in advance, look for gluten-free menus, and don't be afraid to call places to ask if they can accommodate. Now go ponder the meaning of life over a tasty meal you didn't have to cook. 

*It was a real thing, until a big piece of construction equipment backed over it. Now there's a replacement table at the Brandeezy

1 comment:

  1. Being the newbie that I am, I didn't completely think through EVERYTHING that is put into my chinese food. I ordered off the diet menu because everything was steamed. So I got steamed chicken and veggies and white rice which was all very good. I ordered the garlic sauce on the side and put a little on my food for flavor (and color) without realizing that the garlic sauce probably contained soy sauce. I woke up the next morning feeling terribly puffy and generally ill all over and I think it made me slightly retarded because my brain was firing vastly slower than usual. It has been duly noted that I can order off the diet menu but to stay far, far away from sauces! Of course I could make my own at home but that kind of defeats the purpose of ordering in :)